Monsta Macks Seventh Installment
“Bitches left me cause they thought I was finished
Shoulda knew she wasn't true she came to me when her man caught a sentence
Diamonds are blinding, I never make the same mistakes
Moving with a change of pace, lighter load, see now the king is straight
Swelling my melon cause none of these niggaz real
Heard he was, telling police, how can a kingpin squeal?
This is crazy, I'm on the right track I'm finally found
You need some soul searching, the time is now”
-Nas “One Mic”
The month of November 2003 will go down as one of the most memorable months in my life. I have gone through and seen a lot in the last thirty days. With stuff including the Teddy Hart incident, the renewal of the Northeast Indy wars, the continuing stream of wrestlers dying, Smackdown the Video Game, the Ric Flair DVD, watching Low Ki and Joey Matthews give one hell of a performance, Homicide going back to his barb wire roots, the last Elks lodge show, being kicked off that show, having a really good matches with Roadkill & Crazy Ivan to Michael Jackson being accused again…….it sure was a busy month. Like always though I want to give my shout outs before I get in to it.
In a time where it seems like everyone in the world is at war with someone else, I hope you take time to just realize how all that we have can be taken from us at anytime and we should appreciate it now, no matter how much or how little it is………………..Happy B Day to my Mom whose favorite wrestler is Buff E from the Christopher Street Connection………How sad is that, I ain’t even my own mothers first or second favorite wrestler………she likes Jimmy Snuka!!!!!............To everyone who sent me Thanksgiving greetings, sorry if I didn’t reply to you but my email system has been a mess the last couple of weeks………………….Happy Holidays everyone……..well almost everyone J………… Now on to the news
On the weekends, I am never online due to the fact that my computer at home doesn’t work and during the week, I am limited to about 1 hour a day to check out my mail, and some of the news sites or whatever. It is never good though after a long weekend though, to go online and find out that a wrestler has died. There were a lot of those notices all over in the last couple of months. Road Warrior Hawk and Stu Hart I commented on last time around. The passing of Crash Holly and Pitbull Anthony was a definite surprise to me and the rest of the wrestling world. However as I sit here and write this commentary nearly 2 year to the day that one of my best friends, Russ Haas, passed away, I read that another good friend and great guy was taken from us. Jerry Tuite aka the Wall and Malice never woke up after eating with some of the other wrestlers he was on tour with over in Japan. At the time of his death, acute heart failure was announced as the cause of his untimely passing. For those who have had the fortune of meeting him, you knew he was one of the coolest guys in the locker room. He was also a very large man. He was about 6’ 7”- 6’ 8” and was one of the most jacked up guys I have ever seen. What impressed me though was not his massive size, but how down to earth he was. I remember while he was signed to WCW and on TV for them every week, he came to do some indy shows for Frank Goodman. Normally when guys from the “Big Leagues” would come down, their egos need a separate locker room. Jerry didn’t though. He came in and chilled out with everyone. That’s how he was at every show. He would come in and after his match, change, offer some of the guys a beer and watch the rest of the show. He loved to have a good time in the ring. The only time I was in the ring with him was at the Russ Haas Memorial show. He was teaming with OVW standout and another great guy, Seven, on one side, Mafia and I on another and the team of Charlie Haas and Ekmo aka Jamal or 3 Minute Warning. I remember him telling me before the match that he was looking forward to going at it in the ring with either me or Maf, but we were only in there with him a limited amount of time. I did shove him though and it caught him off guard and I made him laugh with something I said. I don’t remember what exactly it was but I will watch the tape again to see if I can remember. Homicide recently put me on to his All Japan work. He was a way bigger star over in Japan and it wasn’t just because of his size, but rather his in ring work. He was awesome in the ring. The last time I saw him was, surprisingly, backstage at the SSCW show where Scott Steiner wrestled Steve Corino. His face lit up and we talked about Japan and a few other things. He was still cool as ever. I woke up this morning already upset due to the fact that Russ’ anniversary was fast approaching but now I have to say good bye to another and that pisses me off. While people dying will never stop and we just have to deal with it but we should never forget the people who have left us. I know I will do my best to remember our fallen brothers.
With that off of my chest, I can talk about other stuff from the month of November. I have been in many locker rooms in my career and have met a lot of characters but none have left an impression quite like Teddy Hart did on the ROH locker room. I won’t go in to his in ring antics because after the three count was made, I went to the back so I missed his extracurricular activity. All I know is that whatever he did, he had Mafia and a few other guys running to the entrance way ready to beat that ass. Then when they came to the back Devito and Loc were very heated and yelling. It got to the point where they were looking for his bags to throw them out of the locker room which they eventually did. Then I figured after Devito and Loc had finished yelling, that things would cool off so I would go watch the four way match with Samoa Joe, CM Punk, Steve Corino and Chris Daniels. Two problems occurred however. First Punk had his knee go out on him as he was getting ready to go to the back. We tried a few things but it was still messed up. So I went to go get Gabe to let him know how Punk was and maybe consider taking Punk out of the match. After a few minutes, we found Gabe but Punk decided that he was gonna tough it out and go on with the match. I walked him to the entrance way to make sure he is ok when I hear Samoa Joe yelling. Guess who he was yelling at??? I had to pull Teddy Hart back and I told him to just go to the locker room and avoid making it worse. He looked at me as if to say “Who the f*** is this fat ass?” but nodded in agreement after a few seconds. I went to calm Joe down but he was cool. I went up to the balcony to watch the match which went pretty well. Then Daniels went for his moonsault, which is so damn pretty to watch in person, but he landed on Punk’s bad knee. I knew he was gonna need some help after the match. As soon as it was over, I shot down to the curtain waiting for him to come through. I heard him yelling at a few and the next thing I saw was referee Paul Turner breaking through the guardrail and beating up a fan. I saw Whacks, the camera guy pull Punk away and ended up throwing Punk down to the floor on his already really bad knee and then I saw Gabe, of all people, get the guy on the floor. When that happened, Paul had yelled for my help and I moved the crowd and put the guy in a choke hold with his own jersey. Finally some other guys came and escorted that guy out of the building. Gabe and I were escorting Punk to the back when we see all of the locker room to one side, where we knew Teddy had his stuff, and it looked like a riot was going on. We sprinted as fast as we could. When we got there, we had missed a yelling match with the entire ROH locker room vs. Ted Hart. Gabe was huffing and puffing and as he entered the room, he was out of breath and just sat down and gave a lock of “Oh well!”. It was funny as hell. We joked about it later that I was G.S. that night. Gabe Security!.
So I bought the Ric Flair DVD and before you ridicule me about selling out and buying a WWE product, let me just say that this is the best wrestling DVD in the history of DVD’s or tapes for that matter. The first thing I put on was the night they honored him in the ring and man that was awesome to watch. The match with him and Triple H I remember as something fantastic and clapped the first time I saw it on TV but to watch it again, you realize how hard this man works. I will be the first to admit that over the years, Ric had to grow on me considering I wasn’t much of a Flair fan. However as time went on and he had his battles with Funk, Sting and Steamboat, I wanted to party like and with the Nature Boy. His feud with those three along with his feud with Dusty Rhodes, Barry Windham and a few others are documented along with personal commentary from Flair himself. If the DVD just had that, it would be great but the extras are enough to make a any wrestling fan thank God that Vince McMahon let this DVD be sold in stores. Let’s put it this way, I have had the DVD for over a month and I still haven’t finished watching all of them. If you smarks out there think you know anything about wrestling or strong style, watch the opening chop exchange between Flair and Steamboat from their match at Wrestle War. I dare you not to cringe or flinch. This DVD is the benchmark of what all DVD should be based on. This along with the BloodBath: Greatest Steel Cages DVD would be a great gift for any wrestling fan this holiday season.
Speaking of great wrestling, watch the match Low Ki and Joey Matthews had for 3PW. Now everyone who knows me knows that I am constantly putting Ki Homicide and Maf over no matter what but even if I were a Ki hater, which is a very popular trend round these parts, I would praise him for being able to hang with Joey J. This match had a story of two guys who styles seem very opposite of each other yet they meshed so perfect that it is going to be hard for the two to top it next time they meet in the ring. I can’t call it move for move but buy the tape from Smart Mark Video. You also get a brutal match between Homicide and Xavier and you get to watch Roadkill and I shout out the classic match between Tito Santana and Randy Savage for the Intercontinental Belt from back in the days. Please if you watch it though, leave your thought on the new look of the Mack.
Speaking of the 3PW show, after the show, Homicide, Low ki and I went to this club in Philly with Homicide’s brother and man that was an awesome club. It’s a shame none of us can remember the name of the club right now but all I can say was the finest Butter Pecan and Chocolate females live in the Philly area. The place should have been called Club Damn with all the hotness inside. What was really great was that the club was narrow so the more packed it got, the closer the hotness was dancing near us. We have been to clubs all over the world but this little ghetto bar/club was definitely in the top 3. As fun as Philly is, it sucks that everything closes at 2am sharp. After some dancing and wrestling, a brother gets hungry. But after we finally found some food, we went back to Homi’s brother’s house to chill out. We were eating when I realized I had left my drink in our car so I went to go get it. As I walk out the door and start to walk, a giant Boxer dog, which was running around the neighborhood, stopped running to look at me. Right away I said to myself “Oh damn that’s a huge beast. I am so gonna be his lunch breakfast and dinner for the next two years!”. The dog took one step, sniffed and after a five second stare down, the dog remembered he was in the middle of running and went off wherever he was going towards originally. Holy Scary! I love Philly though and for the last 3-4 years, its been my second home with all the wrestling I have done there. New York is just a tad bit better for now.
Well I wish I could write about everything that happened in November but that would be too long of a column and you guys would be bored to death reading it. I will be back soon and I will be giving my thoughts on a few legends. Stan Hansen, Bruiser Brody and Terry Funk are considered by many as absolute legends, myself included. It should be interesting to say the least.
Until next time, keep on hatin’……..
Monsta Mack
AKA Masturbating Bear Stunt Double
AKA Not worth $865.00
AKA Never gonna wrestle in the Rex Plex
AKA The guy in the Paris Hilton Video