Angry Young Man - Matt Dawg

Ok, it's time for me again to come out here to drop some knowledge on all you uninformed jackasses out there.

Now before I rant and rave here on the forum that the DOI was grateful enough to provide for me, I want to just touch base with all of you haters out there first. I know a lot of people are going to read this column and think to themselves, "Gee, how come this asshole has a column? He isn't in the business." Or the usual reply to my columns of, "God damn Matt Da Niggerspic, you suck monkey cock and deserve to be gang raped by sheep and then shot in the head with a nail gun!!!" I am going to make a preemptive strike. I am going to tell you all to lick my goddamn nut sack because the fact is, I am a wrestling fan. Plain and simple. I have been a fan since the age of 5 years old and that alone qualifies me to have OPINIONS on the wrestling business. If I feel that someone deserves more than they are getting from this business, than I have every right to express my thoughts on the subject. If I think Wrestler A is going to beat Wrestler B at Joe Schmo's Championship Wrestling than so what? That is why it is MY OPINION. Mike Zevon was nice enough to give me this forum to express myself and I am going to use it in any way I see fit. So Haters Hate On and a Big FUCK YOU to those who don't like it.

Good, now that I have gotten that off of my chest, I can drop more opinions of whatever I would like to. Today, I am going to do something that I don't usually do. I am going to hype and upcoming show. Kind of a cheap plug for me to whore myself out. And since it is my column, I can do as I please. HAHA.

Anyway, on May 14, 2004, USA Pro Wrestling Presents: "Deadly Sins" at the Club Amazura Concert Hall located at 91-12 144th Place in Jamaica, New York.

The main event of the evening features to stars who contributed to changing the landscape of professional wrestling today. Those men are "The Franchise" Shane Douglas and Raven. This battle is a rematch of St. Valentine's Day Massacre which saw Douglas win the USA Pro Title from Raven. Only this rematch will take place inside a 15 foot high steel cage.

Both of these men were staples in what was known as Extreme Championship Wrestling out of Philadelphia Pennsylvania. Both men were former ECW World Champions and probably will forever be known as the two most recognizable ECW Champions in history.

Douglas started what was known as the ECW Revolution on August 27, 1995. See, Eastern Championship Wrestling was under the NWA (National Wrestling Alliance) banner and the NWA was running a tournament to crown a new World Champion. Shane Douglas, who was the ECW champion at the time, won the tournament by beating Too Cold Scorpio in the finals. Shane then spoke about the lineage of the NWA Title and how honored he was to hold the belt. Douglas then shocked the entire wrestling world, including NWA Promoter Dennis Carluzo by throwing down the NWA belt, claiming it meant crap to him. He told all the former NWA champions to kiss his ass as he boasted that the ECW is the only World title that means anything in the world. He then made the announcement that changed the course of wrestling forever, Eastern Championship Wrestling was no more and was being renamed EXTREME CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING. The company was owned by Todd Gordon and he was helped by Paul E. Dangerously (Paul Heyman).

Over the next few years, both Raven and Douglas held the ECW World Title and revolutionized the art of promos and angles. Both men had runs in the WWF and WCW respectively but revamped their careers in ECW. Their title reigns in ECW established them as stars and helped them cement their status in wrestling history.

Lately a lot of people complain about both Douglas and Raven saying that they are washed up, past their primes or just looking for a pay day. I beg to differ. See, in USA Pro, many veterans for one reason or another, choose to use USA Pro as a launching pad. Those who phone it in at other independent shows some reason choose to step up their game in USA Pro. They let it all hang out and pull out all the stops. Which is why I predict that Raven vs. Shane Douglas on May 14, will be a real barn burner and these men will tear the house down in a fantastic main event. I also predict that Raven will recapture the USA Pro title by defeating Douglas in the cage.

Also on the card is a first time meeting between the man, who in my eyes is the best wrestler not in the WWE today, "The Notorious 187" Homicide meeting the most Suicidal, Homicidal, Genocidal man on the planet, Sabu. Over the past few years, Sabu, who has been plagued by injury after injury seemed to be moving at half speed. He hasn't been delivering the types of matches that fans seen to love seeing from him. However over the past 6 months, Sabu has reinvigorated his career. Sabu has been delivering like Sabu of 1996. He has been having fantastic matches all around the country, including NWA TNA. I expect Homicide to do what not many people do lately. BEAT SABU!!!!! Homicide picks up the win with a move involving a table.

A possible show stealer is on the card as Indy legend, "The Fallen Angel" Christopher Daniels returns to USA Pro Wrestling and takes on the recently off the injured list, Amazing Red. I had the privilege of seeing Red in his first match back from injury at ROH and I was a bit distressed. Red did not look 100% to me as he was a step off. Don't get me wrong, he still shined in his match, picking up the victory. But in the back of my mind, I just kept thinking to myself that he rushed back too soon and may be doing more damage to himself than good. I hope I am wrong. But being that both men have wrestled before and that Daniels is one of the best in the world, this match won't disappoint.

Next up is a bit of a disappointment in my eyes. "The Godfather of Cool" Simon Diamond and Matt Stryker battle Joel and Jose Maximo, The SAT for the USA Pro Wrestling tag team titles. This is where the controversy comes into play. Apparently Zero ONE's American counterpart, World-1 was expected to run a show that same day. Not a problem. Matt Stryker, one half of the tag team champions, wanted to work World-1 as he feels he can get to Japan through them. Ok, no problem there in my book. Here is where the problem starts. Frank Goodman, USA Pro Wrestling promoter has to have his tag team titles defended on his show. So he rightfully strips Simon and Stryker of the tag titles. BUT......World-1 cancels their show. Stryker wants to come back and honor his original commitment. I am ok with that too as I feel Stryker had a valid reason for wanting to cancel. My problem is with the fact that Stryker gets to keep his tag team title. That is wrong. He was stripped, stay stripped. Put Simon and Stryker in the tag team gauntlet match and let the SAT fight someone else for the straps. But hey, I am not the booker so what do I know? Anyway, this match should be solid as Matt Stryker has improved leaps and bounds over the past two years and is ready to establish himself as one of the top Indy wrestlers around today. Simon Diamond, he always delivers. As for the SAT, Joel Maximo has shed some pounds and is looking fantastic in the ring. He and Jose are slowly but surely becoming international superstars and improving their tag team performances. Should be solid. My pick, SAT win the Tag Titles again as I don't see "The Powers That Be" in USA Pro rewarding Stryker for the situation and for some reason, Frank Goodman seems to really like the SAT no matter how many times they shit on him.

Danny Maff vs. Jay Lethal is going to be top notch. Unfortunately I don't think this match us going to get the time it deserves due to all of the matches on the card. However, with the limited time they will get, they won't disappoint. Maff wins with the burning hammer since it is Lethal's first USA Pro show and Maff is/was a USA Pro mainstay. But expect this contest to be very good and expect rematches in several other promotions. Lethal and Maff both had breakout years last year and 2004 should be no different.

"M-Tizzle" Mike Tobin vs. Norman Smiley for the USA Pro US Title. Mike Tobin has been on fire as a singles competitor. He has shown that he has "it" and that he is willing to learn each day. He is taking all of the information he has been getting from veterans in like a sponge. I think Tobin and Smiley will deliver on both the wrestling and comedy level in this match. Mike Tobin gets a huge notch on his belt and defeats Smiley for the win.

Lowlife Louie Ramos vs. Reefer. It's Louie. It's Reefer. They know each other well. They are both great at what they do. They are both going to bleed like stuffed pigs. Nuff said.

In what internet reports are going to claim to be the match of the night, ROH World Champion Samoa Joe makes his debut in USA Pro and battles Low-Ki. This is going to be painful to watch and in a good way. Both men are going to beat the hell out of each other, LITERALLY. I expect welted chests, swollen lips or eyes and lots of chops. In a surprise, Samoa Joe gets the win by choking out Low-Ki but not before getting stiffed like nobodies business.

Simply Luscious vs. Tara Charisma for the Women's title. Luscious is one of the few who had the honor of training under Shawn Michaels at the Texas Wrestling Academy. She knows how to work and it amazes me why she hasn't been called by the WWE yet. Then again, Alexis Laree did get called and lord knows where she is so maybe it is a good thing she hasn't. Tara Charisma is serious about wrestling and has proven that in other feds. I don't think this will get over 6 minutes but it will be 6 solid minutes. Luscious wins however, as taking the belt off of her so quickly will devalue the Women's division before it even starts.

Balls Mahoney will be getting an "Extremely Violent" surprise. I am 99% positive I know who the surprise is but if I am right, don't want to ruin it by writing it here. So I am going to keep it to myself. But Ball will NOT pick up the victory here as the surprise is too big of a name to lose in his USA Pro debut (or return???). Last time USA Pro promised a surprise guest it turned out to be WWE Star Nunzio. I expect a surprise on that level.

A new feature at this show will be the Big Dick Dudley Memorial Tag Team gauntlet. The teams included are:

Bam Bam Bigelow & Chris Candido w/Sunny
Los Lunatics (Low-Ryda & Eddie Guapo)
All Money is Legal (K-Murda & K-Pusha)
The Heavy Hitters (Boogalou & Monsta Mac)
The Solution (Papadon & Havok)
The Christopher Street Connection (Buff. E & "Eye Candy" Mace Mendoza)
The Dirty Rotten Scoundrelz (EC Negro & KC Blade)
Elm Street Kids (Psycho & Rayza w/Penny Dreadful)
PLUS 2 MYSTERY TEAMS!!!!

This match is hard to pick since I don't know who the two mystery teams are. My guess is going to be that either Bam Bam Bigelow and Candido or the Dirty Rotten Scoundrelz pick up the win. It makes the most sense depending on who wins the tag titles. (i.e. SAT vs. DRS next show or Bam Bam & Candido vs. Simon & Stryker). But those are my final two teams and I am sticking to it.

Do to making his first tour of Japan; Deranged is unable to appear at the show. Deranged has been the USA Pro X-treme champion for sometime but USA Pro has a rule in place that all titles must be defended at each show so therefore he has been stripped of his belt. The title will be fought for by someone. My guess is that it goes on Slyk Wagner Brown as he is most deserving. Unless they put the belt up in one of the already announced matches.

ALSO Scheduled to appear:
Mikey Whipwreck & Wayne the Convenience store guy, Kamala the Ugandan Giant, Crowbar Devon Storm, The Masked Maniac, THE NY STATE CHAMPION "The Arsonist" Tim Arson, Axl Rotten, Slyk Wagner Brown w/ April Hunter, Shark Boy, Nick Berk, "Bulletproof" Billy Reil, Dixie, Prince Nana, Mike "The Shooter" Kruel, Brian XL, Dan Barry, Alere Little Feather, "The Physical Phenomenon" Poppalishus, Dany Yamz, Travis Blackchurch, Mr. Big, Jav, James Newblood, Johnny TNT, Dana Dameson, Becky Bayless, Johnny "The Bison" Bravado, The Motivator, Ken Scampi and MORE.....................

But the most important thing happening at this show is that me, Matt Dawgs Da Infamous Angry Young Man will be in attendance and I guarantee that I have an announcement concerning myself and USA Pro that is going to change the face of USA Pro forever. An announcement so big, I expect to be fake posted about it on message boards to the whole week following this show. An announcement so huge that all you haters are going to hate me more than ever. So sit tight for it. Anyway, that's all for now folks. I will be back real shortly with another column for all you d*ckheads who hate them but read them anyway so you can go to a message board and complain about it. LOL. F*ck you and die.