Oasis "Cigarrettes and Alcohol"
Thanks for the lyrics Leroy from Maspeth!

What up all you DOI maniacs and wacky ass people, and welcome to another (not) award winning column here on the DOI site, the infamous McRoss Report. I’ve been lazier than an eye updating this column, so I’ll make sure to talk about as much as possible.

Greetings from the man underneath the 5 Gallon Heineken bottle.

Can you believe the McRoss Report has been around for 8 months already? Damn I'll drink to that!

Ok first things first. I listen to the no integrity (That’s right, no integrity! LoL) USA PRO Hotline at 516-214-8333. I hear The Masked Maniac, who claims to have a 78 inch sausage, talking about a column here on the DOI site. The column I’m referring to is Monsta Macks Maniac Minute.
First off, Monsta Macks Maniac Minute was a one time thing, so I think it paid more tribute to the Masked one, then copy. Then I hear The Maniac saying the McRoss Report is a bite off the Maniac Minute! Hello Masked Maniac, I rip off Jim Ross, not The Masked Maniac! If I ripped off the Masked Maniac, it would be the McMasked Maniac Report. (Hmm good idea, but I don’t think I have enough hotdogs to write it)
Bottom line is this, Thank God someone is original around here, and I’m talking about Mike Zevon. Great 5 Foot Minute. A unique style, a unique column. Check it out under Mike’s staff page.

Speaking of Mike Zevon….
The Daily Mike Zevon McRoss Report Interruption
I would like to interrupt this McRoss Report with an urgent message to all people who like to have sex with their boyfriends or girlfriends. Watch out for middle aged men in camouflage outfits peeping through your bedroom window. There are perverts out there and some of them just may be your best friends!
Back to you MiC !

Thanks a lot Mike.
After doing some researching on the DOI Message board, I have found out who this perp is, that Mike was referring to. Here are the exclusive DOI message board pics:

Apparently, The Motivator has been doing more than just wrestling hardcore matches in his free time. Speaking of which, what’s up with the Hardcore Legend, The Motivators hat? It looks like it’s getting tighter and tighter every day!
While on The Motivator, I had the (dis)pleasure of being at his apt the other day. All I gotta say is, for as clean as it was, he totally went back to his old self. I think I found his toothbrush under his Redskin Jersey!

You know I’m just fucking with you Marc lol But seriously, clean your apt.

I was very saddened to hear about Road Warrior Hawk. I was a huge fan of the LOD growing up, and today. LOD was tag team wrestling. There is nothing I could really write, that hasn’t been said before, but people in wrestling are dying way too young.

Congratulations to Mike Zevon on his upcoming wedding this Sunday! Upon Mike’s return expect a major announcement, and I’m not talking about his divorce lol.

FUCK YANKS JUST LOST! It’s all good, Yanks in 7.

NYWC has a show this Saturday, against Game 6 of the World Series. As much as I love the Yanks, I’m loving NYWC, so expect The MiC and the DOI wackpacker Tailgating party to begin around 5ish outside of the Deer Park Community Center. Plus, you can catch the show, and be able to see the 7th inning and on of the game, and everyone knows that’s when the game gets interesting.

Upcoming shows that look really good:
Oct 25- NYWC and WXW
Nov 1- ROH
Nov 2- JCW
Nov 7 SSCW
Nov 8 JAP
Nov 15- LXW and CSWF

Try to support one of these promotions as they are all doing good things and putting on good wrestling.

What’s with Robert Payes pants?

Alere Little Feather is still The MiC’s favorite drunk. She puts down firewater like a champ!

Hey Fecal Threats- chill my man, I don’t need you taking dumps in my house, and NOT in the bathroom.

I think the Yankees lost today because I wasn’t drinking Sapporro during Matsuii’s at bat.

USA PRO has the last elks show on nov 29. Many matches have been announced, but what I’m looking forward to the most is Deranged/Reefer/Sonjay Dutt in a ladder match. Imagine if someone like J-Busta was added to it?

Speaking of USA Pro wrestlers, when will The Solution and Christopher Street Connection get a tag title shot?

SSCW is coming soon, and I’ll talk about it more in a future column, but this show will be great.

This college shit aint cut out for me. I got a 2 year degree already, and you can’t do shit with it, why waste 2 more years, when I can be partying like Jake The Snake all day long.

Dexter Weiner is one of the funniest people people don’t know.

Ok jac.

I gotta crack up at something someone forwarded me. Someone got mad that LXW gave DOI free tickets to give away on the site. That ignorant prick than said, “We may be the originals and innovators when it comes to these ticket giveaways…”
Are you fucking retarded? LOL that was one of the funniest things I read. Can you imagine someone saying that? I mean I can’t believe I’m wasting my time on this, but I know some people asked me to comment about it, especially my black friends in Maspeth. I guess this dimwit never heard of Howard Stern. I guess this mental defect never heard of concert giveaways on radio. I guess this splooge never saw 1wrestling.com giving out tickets. Jesus man, get off the DOI tip and go to psychotherapy you needledick.

No candycanes this week. I’m very disappointed. Come on people, it only takes 2 seconds.

From what I’ve been heard, and after meticulous and detailed research, I have heard that EC Negro will now be using the piledriver as a finisher.

“I wanna book the fat one!”

DA TREK SQUAD BABY!!!!!!!! Da Trek Squad has a promising future and could be the next tag team to dominate Japan, if booked properly. PUMP PUMP!

Welcome aboard Pete Stanisforth, Mike fancies lots of good comments about you.
Did I use “fancies” right?

Expect TWO MAJOR interviews to be coming up sooner than later, courtesy of The Viperman, who I am very pissed at for being a yankee hater.

LXW on November 15, looks to be very fucking unique and a great night of wrestling. Big ups to Slash for all the support.

I have just received confirmation that Johnny “Bison” Bravado is not Chinese.
He’s Korean.

Hockey Season has started and all I gotta say, as a die hard Rangers fan, things aren’t looking pretty.

Hey everyone, watch out if you’re a devils fan or member of NJ Devils management, and Ricky O is near you! He is known for knocking them out!

Wefewee Wimmy Wames calls the Masked Manaic hotline too much!

The Womans wrestling scene is really heating up. So much talent is floating around from Ariel to April from Lily to Tara to dozens of others. Can’t list everyone sorry, but you know who you are. It’s good to see womens wrestling alive and flourishing.

Frankie V is not a diva!

Another Mike Zevon interruption:
Mike Zevon doesn’t answer fan email from certain people.

Thank you Mike, yet again.

Joel Grayson likes dark meat.

Want to find out something interesting? Ask Monsta Mack about who lays down pipe.

Keep checking DOI Gossip for some hot shit.

A special DOI will finally be in print and available for purchase at USA Pro on Nov 29.

I’m dressing up as Scott Hall for Halloween. Chico.

Lots of DOI shit going on. Expect some ROH tape reviews to go up soon.

Anyone into Playstation 2? I just got Simpsons Hit and Run, great shit. Waiting for the new Smackdown to come out, that shit is going to be hotter than a gonnoreah piss.

Thanks to everyone for posting on the DOI message board, and giving me something to read.

Big ups to Dirty Sanchez, I can’t wait to purchase something in your warehouse of beer!

Can Crazy Ivan wrestle people other than non-whites? I think it’s time to see Ivan go with the ball, after seeing his electric match with J-Busta in WXW.

Speaking of WXW congrats are in order to Tommy Seude and Mean Gene Sinisky in their recent WWE Dark matches. Tommy is one of the best cruisers today, and Gene will do an excellent job as the WXW champion.

What up Guapo, where’s my taco?

No one is bringing any gun.

Notre Dame football is starting to be painful to watch.
Ditto the Giants.

Who do you want to see interviewed by the DOI? Shoot me an email.

I recommend Shawn Sheridans and Devin Sturgis’s personal journals for some good time reads.

Anyone else getting that Wrestlecrap book? That book looks to be hilarious.

JAP’s Nov 8 show is shaping up to be an unforgettable show.

If it aint in the front..then it’s in the back!

Anyone get that Macho Man Cd? I know Tobin got it immediately. I heard some of it, and I gotta say it’s fucking a side splitter.

Who’s been watching TNA Xplosion?

How come you can get a 12 pack of Heineken at some places for 10.99 but at some places a 6 pack costs that much? That is fucking bullshit and I had it with this fuckin bodega.

Stay away from a MiC/Tony Burma late night joke for joke session! The only person who can appreciate it is that big headed fellow, Dan Barry.
Speaking of Mr. Irish Car Bomb, Dan Barry will be appearing at Zig Zags on Nov 7, and there will be a comedy session with that bartender who makes those jokes about Carmine lol.

MAAAAAAAA!

Carmine is a cool guy and I’m glad to be aboard the SSCW ship.

I just got my 1918 shirt!

Alright I’m rambling now and have nothing left to talk about.
I’ll keep updating this shit as I get more info.
IF anyone wants to see something discussed in the McRoss Report, shoot me an email.

Wordlife.
Sean “The MiC” McCaffrey
BULLSMC@aol.com