Open Letter To Whoever Runs this Dog & Pony Show
Listen up, week after week I have to endure this bullshit. Then I looked at the PPV results.You wonder why your buyrates suck as you serve up another platter of poop? Are you just a developemental territory for Vince or are you a rest home for burnt out WWE castoffs?
The only "TNA" star that you insist on pushing down our throats is Robert Roode. I'd rather stick needles in my eyes than watch this untalented douche. The only reason anybody watches him is in the hopes that Traci will level him as her tits pop out. You have a tremendous talent base with Homicide, Low Ki, Hernandez, Styles, Daniels, Shelly, Dutt, Lethal, Joe, Abyss,ect. Yet on your PPV , who goes over, The fuckin Dudleys, and other WWE cast offs.
A main event with Cage/ Angle? I'd rather watch the lemon pie at Shoprite go sour. I'm Angled out. Then you brought his wife in and forgot her oats bag. Then you try to build Joe up to be a killer heel, then stick him in a feud with Nash. No offence , but Nash gets hurt everytime he puts on the tights. A Joe/Morgan feud might have been interesting, but you would probably have Morgan go over. Your booking is worse than any crap I have ever seen and I go back to the days of Bruno , so I know what I'm talking about.
Vince Russo has found religion, but he's still in the wrestling business. Wrestling and Religion are like oil and water, they don't mix and never will mix. So instead of creative, intriguing, story lines, we have the toilet humor that Vince McMahon was so fond of when Vinnie Ru was working for him. Gay jokes, gay inuendos, every fuckin week you have some king of gay reference. Then you have Borash, who looks like he was burping cock, keep this shit going with Eric Young, Kurt Angle and others. I'm suprised you haven't had him toss Joe's salad on a PPV.
When I think of the booking staff you could have with Raven, Simon Diamond, Shane Douglas, ( Not that he would give up a sure thing at Target to work for morons again), a guy named Heyman is just sitting home, ect. So you go with One Shot Russo, Dutch way before cable Mantel, and I'm sure Jarett has put in his 2 cents too. It's retarded. Maybe Pee wee Moore is right, maybe McMahon owns it all.
TNA getting that extra hour is like putting 10 lbs of shit in a 5lb bag. It doesn't fit. Instead of good wrestling we get faggoty nonsence every week. Why don't you guys hire the Christopher Street Connection? At least they are more entertaining than opening a door and seeing Borash kneeling between Kurt Angle's legs. Funny, if Vince did that shit, someone would be up in his grill, but their not up in yours for one big reason. Nobody really knows that your on the air and the people that do don't care anymore. If you had an incident even close to the Benoit killings, no one would know because 9 out of 10 people don't even know what TNA is.
So, to recap, all of your former champions are now jobberes for WWE guys. Of your former killer tag team , AMW, one guys gotten real fat and the other just drinks beer. Your resident monster ( Abyss) is as threatening as Barney. Anybody good you let go so you could bring in a minority felon to get buy rates. And that tanked. So what will you do in ' 08 ? You could try actual wrestling with intriguing characters and story lines, but then , that's just a dream like Florida, Georgia, Southwest, Mid Atlantic, Mid South, Portland, ect. I guess they were all dreams too. But at least they were wrestling dreams that came true, not the nightmare that TNA is. And now on to tonight's misery.
Fallout from the PPV, Roode has no remorse for breaking Sharmel's jaw. I have a lot of remorse for tuning in. Gotta load the bong. What a way to open the show.
Interview with Booker, Roode vs Tray, King vs Kim, but first the guy who gave notice Sensi and Skipper vs the MCMG. Could be good. Sensi and Spi are heels here. Tenay & West run down the PPV especially the AJ turn. Next up is Against All Odds? That should be your mantra because it's against all odds that your still on the air, good match though. Great teamwork between Shelly & Sabin. Next week Russo will job them to the VMK. Guns take it. Good opener.
Cage comes out and tosses Skip and Sensi out. He calls out AJ, wow big suprise here. AJ cost him the belt, this company cost AJ his credibility. Chris Harris is bitching to Cornette. Cornette makes Harris vs Judas next. Joe comes in screaming " you set me up". Joe says he'll "handle " Nash tonight. Borash is out sucking Angle's ass in the parking lot with AJ & Karen. They tell Borash to get the bags. This is gonna be a long night.
Add for thisTerminator TV show. Whopper comercial,no one wants to eat after 2 hours of this shit.Borash tells AJ he has to have eyes in the back of his head.No comment. Is Borash part of the Angle Alliace. They are going to "coranate" "Prince " AJ. I'm one second from turning this shit off. Knock on the door , Tomko, tells AJ he's on his own.
Judas vs Harris I predict a squash, what the hell, they burying Harris anyway. Mitchell joins on commentary. Mitchell secret with Abyss will be exposed next week as Harris gets his ass kicked. Judas miss a frog splash. Harris rallies a bit. Then Judas blows the " Crimson Mist". Still watching old Kubuki matches, are ya Vinnie? Judas gets the win , like we expected anything else
Tracy talks about her match with Roode. Recap of the Kong/Kim match.VKM with Roxy vs Petey Williams & Dutt. Williams is making the VKM look really bad. Commercial. VKM is beating the dog out of Petey Scott Steiner switches the cases. Don't ask me to go into detail about an angle that sucked back in '07. Dutt is alone, VKM loses . BJ & Kip argue. Kip wants to know who BJ's partner is by next week. Oooo the suspence.
Aj & Borash are "hiding" under the stairs. Eric Young joins them. Where my fuckin remote ,I'm putting something on until this shit is done. Oh, now a recap of Team 3d's feud with the X Division. I might slice my wrists, no I'll pack the bong. Now Three Douches are in the ring. They challenge the MCMGs and Lethal to a street fight at the next PPV debacle. Global Impact next week, TNA boring the Japanese fans to death. Joe runs in after Nash , Nash has a Kendo Stick. That fuckin Ace Collection just called so I'm missing this. Now Booker reveals that Sharmel"s jaw was shattered ( no comment although I can think it) so Booker will be the guy that Roode gets the rub off. This guy couldn't get over if he got decapitated on TV. Roode Vs Tracy
Rude is in the ring , stirring the shit. Roode is trying to be ravishing. He fires Tracy. He gonna do something that he should have done a long time ago. Get a real job at Target? Tracy comes out, knocks Roode bloody, then sticks his head up her pussy until he suffocates. Hey, I can dream can't I ?weed 'll do that to a fella.
Tracy blubbers in front of him, then says at the end of the day, your just a prick named Rob. Cornette comes out and breaks this up.Cornette threatens to fire him and the fans go nuts. You listening Vinnie Ru. No we'll let Booker kill him. Tracy leaves and the "stalker" gets her. She's Roode new girl.
AJ & Borash are at Universal Studios AJ is dressed like an Egyptian. Borash gets wood. Tag match. Two Guys Who Fondle Their Erections vs LAX with Shelly. No Christy Hemme this week.Did she finally figure out that everytime she kisses Hoyt , she sucks Rave's dick by proxy? The Infection is getting demolished. Hernandez thows Rave across the ring. I'm lovin this shit. Infection is totally outclassed by LAX. Homicide gets the pin on Rave.
ODB says she gets the winner of the Kim/kong match. At least on this channel you don't get that anti smoking commercial with the one legged guy in the park bitching about all this came from smoking. If it did , you must have started when you were still a sperm cell. Shark boy comes out like he just got released from the ER. The announcers are yelling whats the purpose oft this? we, at home, echo these sentiments. Sharkboy should change his fish gimmik to Charlie, the Tuna.
AJ & Borash are in a bathroom with Karen Angle. Its not a three way trust me. Karen tells Borash that they'll have "quality Time" Does that mean that she'll bang him in the ass with a strap on? Borash smiles & leaves. She seductively teases AJ.
Kaz has the rat, now named Marlena ( how fucking original). Kurt Angle is coming out. I may vomit. This will kill the last half hour of this show. Wow, you've done it, your Vince McMahon.
Angle's got the mike, Prince AJ is sitting in a plastic throne, Kurt puts a crown on his head. I just threw up in my mouth. Angle tells the crowd to kiss his ass, Borash just smiles and licks his lips. All fuckin drama. Christian elevated AJ's carreer? Can't see that anywhere.Here comes Cage
Cage says Angle tapped out Sunday. Crowd agrees. Crowd chants Princess AJ. Cage asked if AJ's ready to Man Up. Borash gets wood. Cage says if you give Karen 4 bucks and a glass of Boones Farm, Tenay makes some oblique pop wine from the 70's references that only a wino would know.
Joe comes out, Cage goes to make a tag match. Cornette come out and stops everything. Three way next week. Up next Kong/Kim. Kong comes to the ring with another woman. Good brawl. Kong gets slammed into a gimmicked wall as we go to comercial. Back , Kong has the upper hand , then Gail , lot's of near falls. Good match. Kim takes three power bombs in a row as Kong gets the win & the title. Great match, now how come your woman's division out shines the mens?
I'm about ready to give up on this shit. There is so much that could be done, but they would have to fire the whole booking staff. Draft Paul Heyman!! Maybe I'll be back next week, Maybe I won't . Later, 42P
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